One way in which my approach to kink is closer to (what we stereotypically think of as) the BDSM way of doing things, rather than (what we stereotypically think of as) the spanking/CP way of doing things, is that I’m much happier with clear and explicit negotiation and consent. I don’t mean to imply by ...
[Update: You can now download my story from this collection for free.] Well, hello there kinky reader. (And also hello there potentially-kinky-but-not-quite-sure reader.) How does helping to cure cancer by reading 250 pages of high-class smut sound? You with me? Good. Abel & Haron of the Spanking Writers have put ...
I don’t come either to praise or to bury them — not least because I count myself among their number — but to acknowledge the existence of, and characterise in a very low-rent amateur psychology sort of way, a generation of men in the kink who, due to temporary and never-to-be-repeated circumstances, are more than ...
I came to think of myself as a theoretical switch. At Shadow Lane parties, for example, when I’ve deigned to fill in the name-badge orientation bubbles honestly — and didn’t fill them all in, or fill none in, in a petty and self-righteous attempt to deny any categorisation — it’s been “Switch” ...
[Note added April 12, 2011. I’m afraid I did speak too soon. It now looks like the temporary equality of M/M content on spankingtube.com was a transitional thing to do with updating their software. Not only is M/M content now hidden from the site’s home page once more, their FAQ now describes their approach to ...
Someone asked me a while ago — paraphrasing, but not much — how someone bottoming could get into my head as a top. The question threw me, and I struggled to answer — and I think the reasons why that was the case are instructive. There are (at least) two different ways to interpret the ...
Some post-Shadow Lane thoughts, in no particular order or coherence. At this September’s party I felt more comfortable than I have before; more of a sense of being inside looking out than outside looking in. I’m sure that’s mostly just an effect of familiarity with the grammar of these events, and also ...
[Originally written as a reply to a (long-gone) blog post, this sort of works on its own.] I think it’s generally a mistake to approach the concept of someone being disciplinarian for someone else assuming it’s really complex or subtle, especially if it’s men we’re talking about here. Since when did ...
My answers to a sequence of questions from a friend, asked as part of personal research, and posted here with a big FWIW disclaimer. Her intro: Explanation: In this paper, I’m looking at sexuality as identity – specifically in the BDSM and spanking communities. Identity is different than action: a man who had ...
There’s something of Henry Higgins about him. And if I told him that, he’d just spend a bloody hour educating me all about Henry Higgins, because I couldn’t possibly know, not being nine-hundred years old. It’s my planet, sunshine, and don’t you forget it. I was lost in the wardrobes when he ...